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Personal Best Karate

Quick way to validate yourself

Posted: May 17, 2019

By Master Christopher Rappold
Excerpt from Be Your Personal Best: Confidence

Everyone enjoys the compliments and validation from each other that you are doing a great job.  It is normal and natural.  Many times, though, especially as you are making progress, there may not be someone right there to tell you that you are doing well.  There are other situations where you work very hard on a project to get it complete and when you finally show it to others, it is met with a lukewarm response.  Immediately you feel under-appreciated or start to question whether it was as good as you originally thought.  

The remedy for this is to set your own criteria for what a good job is and give yourself the internal credit for progress made.  Know that for reasons beyond your control, the response you get from others could be factors that have nothing to do with you (someone is not feeling well, they are preoccupied with other thoughts, they are dealing with other pressing issues, they are simply processing it all in, etc.)  By assuming the worst, you immediately deflate yourself.   

By validating yourself and not depending on it to come from others, when receiving an acknowledgement, you can use it as an additional pat on the back.  If it doesn’t come, it wasn’t needed anyways.  Focus on doing the task or assignment to your standard of excellence and know that this is enough.

Master Christopher Rappold has authored many books on personal development as well as self-defense and bullying strategies. His book Be Your Personal Best: Confidence helps guide yourself and/or others in being more confident and being more successful in life. If you would like a free copy of this book, please visit here.

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